HE LOVES ME, HE LOVES ME NOT

People talk about falling in and out of love all the time. The question is…do we really “fall” in and out of love, or is there more to it?

Let’s look at our behavior when we are “in love.” We are respectful, patient, kind, interested and helpful. We are happy, fun, adventurous, and open to many of our partner’s interests and curious of their feelings about a whole bunch of stuff.

Now let’s look at our behavior when we are “out of love.” We don’t seem to have patience for our partner and because of that we become disrespectful, uninterested, and not there often enough to be helpful. We become bored, the laughing seems to stop and we are not that interested in what our partner has to say. We start to ignore their feelings, focusing on our own, which often times turns into resentment.

Rather than the idea of falling in and out of love, I think what we fall in and out of is respect, kindness and patience.

Now, to blow your mind a little bit. When we fall in love we are actually falling in love with a reflection of ourselves that we see in our partners. So the next time you fall out of love take a look in the mirror and see if the bottom line here is that you have just fallen out of love with a part of yourself.

Dr Donna XO

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